Monthly Archives: July 2012

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I am an overprotective mother.  I don't say that with pride.

But sometimes Fear overwhelms me.

Last weekend Hayden and his cousins went to the movies.  I would have worried anyway, but considering the tragic event in Colorado, I played a chilling scenario in my head over and over.

Just last night, Hallie was invited to a friends to swim.  I started to list the thirty safety rules, she and her dad finished them for me- quite sarcastically I might add.

I'm quite creative when it comes to coming up with things to worry about.

But quite honestly, the world we live in is becoming an increasingly scary place despite security systems, vaccines and airbags.

I handle my fear in several different ways.

1.I avoid doing anything (or letting my children do anything) that might bring about consequences outside my control. This is my most used method.  I like to be in control.

2.I bubble wrap and proceed with extreme caution probably taking the fun out of many things we do.

3.I go ahead and dive in the deep unknown all the while trembling and terrified. Believe it or not I often feel this way when I speak in front of a small crowd.  I'm talking about simply responding to a question in Ladies' Bible Study. It's ridiculous.

4.Not near often enough, I allow the uprising emotion of fear be my signal. Yes. Fear is a distress signal.  And a distress signal suggests that immediate assistance is requested.

"Where does my help come from?

My help comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth.

-Psalm 121:2

The only righteous fear, is fear that focuses on the Almighty.

I know I'm not alone in my struggle with fear. There are mamas out there sending their kids off to camps this summer.  There are others who are sending their babies to college.

There are daddies that threaten to cause bodily harm to anyone who lays a hand on their daughters.

There are those of you waiting for test results-in fear. There are small nagging fears and there is fear that comes from nowhere rendering you unable to move (like the sound of Hayden's weights crashing to the floor in the garage at 1:00 AM this morning).

Fear can be your worst enemy.

Or-

Fear can be your friend; a friend that urges you to lean on One who is stronger, the One who is wiser.

Fear can be the friend that reminds you, "YOU'RE NOT IN CONTROL, TALK TO YOUR FATHER-HE IS".

What fear do you struggle with?

Do you have a favorite verse that brings you comfort?

 

 

 

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Going through my jewelry bag the other day I came across a treasure.  -One silver earring from Kenya.

Back in 2008, my missionary friend sent a package to Jason and I. We were preparing to go Kenya to serve with them at an orphanage.  The package held an envelope with one silver earring. I love earrings and I love silver; and this one was made from a 1954 East African shilling. I looked for its match but couldn't find it.  I decided that my friend must have sent one earring as a sort of deposit to get me excited about the upcoming trip.

The wonderful trip to Kenya came and went.

To my disappointment, Susan hadn't meant to give me one earring.  The whereabouts of its partner remains a mystery.

I loved the earring, but without its match, what use did it have?  It was nothing more than an incomplete set, so it has set in my jewelry bag for almost four years now- amidst a ball of broken necklace chains and tangled beads.  As I rediscovered it the other day, I was consumed with memories from my time in Kenya.

This earring is a reminder of a trip that forever changed me.  It represents a place void of  earthly comforts; but a place where God's presence is strong.  My earring represents hope for those in Kenya and beyond. It reminds me that there will be a time when "my faith shall be sight".  It is a reminder that some day there will be no orphans, no hunger, no sadness....

My treasure doesn't belong in a bag tucked away on a shelf. It is beauty and holds a purpose. Yes, it serves even on its own. And though it resembles a deposit of the glory that is to come, that won't stop me from wearing it now.

This emblem I wear,  once considered to be of little use, now beats in unison with my heart.

I am His.

And He is mine.

My prayer is that I would live a life of faith and love.  And that I would be an instrument that leads others- so they can know God is "theirs" too.

Let love and faithfulness never leave you; bind them around your neck, write them on the tablet of your heart.  Then you will win favor and a good name in the sight of God and man.  -Proverbs 3:3,4 

 

 

 

 

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Vacation Bible School starts tonight, July 29 at FBC-6:00.  VBS will run through Thursday. I'll be looking for you!

 

Also this TUESDAY- (before VBS) at 5:00, we will meet at Dairy Queen (for ice cream or supper or both).  We're just meeting for a chat and a snack. WEAR YOUR NEW GOD'S GIRLIES SHIRTS.  Come late if you need to. We'll head to VBS from DQ.  But even if you can't meet us at Dairy Queen, wear your God's Girlies shirt to VBS. Try to make it to Dairy Queen even if you're not able to make VBS.

BIG NEWS:

Some of God's Big Girlies (our youth girls) will be joining our next gathering.  They want a chance to see what we're doing.  We have plans to partner with them in the upcoming school year.  I'm super excited about this!

Our next meeting is planned for Sunday, August 19.  The details are still up in the air as far as time and place.  We're still planning-We want it to be dynamite!! Keep an eye out for details.

You've been missed, but I'll see you soon!

GG'S-GATHERING AND GROWING TO GOD'S GLORY

 

 

 

 

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Today marks the remembrance of two anniversaries.

Forty-five years ago today my mom and my dad said, "I do".  Their marriage is a beautiful picture of devotion. Their love for each other and their love for the Lord has been my guide throughout my life.

My mom and dad with the kids

Six years ago today I sat in a waiting room.  I went with my mom to a routine appointment.  To my surprise, a nurse called my name and asked that I follow her.  As I walked briskly behind the nurse trying to keep up, she murmured, "Your mom's test came back positive".  Not understanding, I replied, "What?".  She said your mother has breast cancer and I thought you might want to sit with her while she waits for the doctor.  There is no word that strikes fear more than the word "cancer".  We weren't given any immediate prognosis.  I don't think my mind would have had the capacity to hear details beyond what I'd already heard.

I was sure our lives would never be the same.

Later that day we sat at my house, much in disbelief with my dad.  I can tell you that out of all of the brave souls I know, my mom wasn't one of them.  She was cautious.  She was a worrier.  And she was a very private woman.  If I could make a list of attributes describing my mom, her strength would not have been one of them.

No, our hope would lie one who's stronger.

We began to pray and we began to ask others to pray. My mom had surgery and we were glad to hear that the doctor felt confident that radiation would rid her of any remaining cancer. As the cancer was removed from her body, bits of my mother began to chip away...... but not the parts of her you may be thinking.

Her caution turned to a boldness as she made bookmarks for others battling cancer. Where once she was ruled by worry , I watched a greater faith spring up.  She was no longer the private woman I once knew.  She shared her own battle and made herself available to listen to others. As I had imagined, our lives have never been the same.

At one point I told my mother she had went from being a "worrier" to a "prayer warrior".

She's been cancer free for five years now; every member of our family touched by the experience.  But more importantly, we've been touched by God who brings beauty from ashes.

As you probably know, butterflies are a symbol of hope and resurrection for those touched by cancer. These pictures of Hallie- at a tree covered in butterflies- was taken on the day we found out my mom had cancer.

 

Pink is the color specifically for breast cancer, which is what mom had. Hallie, not usually much on the color pink, came out of her room in this get-up.  This also was on the day we got the cancer news.

July 28 will always be a date that I reflect on two legacies:

- A blessed life that came from the union of two wonderful people. 

- And a strength I hadn't yet known which blossomed from a beautiful

transformation only God can create.

Below is the poem my mom wrote during her cancer treatments.

Worrier to Warrior

When I am not in control of my life

Worry sets in causing much strife.

If my wants and worries, to the Lord I bear,

Will consequences come with answered prayer?

Even when I have a wonderful day,

I’ll worry about troubles coming my way.

Oh what troubles will tomorrow bring?

Will my worries ever change a thing?

Does God want me to worry my life away

Or give my worries to Him when I pray?

Then real trouble touched my life one day

Answered prayer, He took my worries away.

Now the Lord is my strength and my shield.

With the power of the Spirit, I am filled.

My helmet, salvation and my sword, God’s word.

My enemies are powerless when I trust in the Lord.

I’ll follow His commands and His armor I’ll wear

A good soldier of Jesus Christ, I’ll be prepared.

Now when trouble in the distance I see,

Not a Worrier but a Prayer Warrior I will be.

Gaye Griffin Fowler

September 4, 2006

Written during my Cancer Treatments

Is any one of you in trouble?  He should pray.

James 5:13 NIV

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She knows when he’s coming. Her bare feet scamper across the floor and into the front closet; the place where our mails spills in.  She’s been waiting.  Not for the mail, but for the mailman.  From inside the closet Rylie pushes up the creaky cover to the mail slot and shouts a greeting.  Sometimes she says “Hello Mr. Mailman”.  Other times she says, “Thanks for the mail”.

At first I tried to stop her.

I had noticed that he didn’t respond and I didn’t want to annoy the man.  I know that he moves quickly in order to empty the stacked crates full of important envelopes and bulky advertisements.

And frankly, I worried that he might find it strange to be greeted by a faceless someone. But I knew it was harmless and that it brought her joy so I let her continue.

One day this week Hayden witnessed her routine. Knowing Rylie must be wondering why he didn’t answer, Hayden suggested that maybe he couldn’t hear her.  He said that he had seen him wearing earphones before. …Quite possibly so.

We may never know why he doesn’t respond.  Maybe someday he will.  School days will be here soon and there will no longer be the voice speaking love from the mail slot.

I’ve wondered why he doesn’t respond.  Surely he can hear her.  Is he too busy? Does he not respond to her because he thinks it’s strange?

And then I wondered some more....

 

Is there somebody who calls out to me day after day?

Sure, some days I listen.  But then there are other times....

I’m so busy.

I’m distracted.

There are other voices in my head.

Sometimes I hear him, but I choose not to respond.

Don’t I know he’s waiting?  Don’t I know that he really wants to hear from me?

My sheep hear My voice, and I know them and they follow.  John 10:27

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Yesterday I took Hallie out for some mom/girl time. We each had a frappe from McDonalds.

This may not seem note worthy to you, but a frappe costs several bucks a whop.  I'm kind of a cheapskate. Another thing you must know: I don't like frappes. I don't like anything that has a hint of coffee, but I chugged one down yesterday. I might also mention that one was spilled in the car. And our date ended with a second trip to McDonalds to retrieve a forgotten purse.  A small sacrifice I know, but it brought about these thoughts.

 Love is costly.

It may cost money. It also costs time.

Love is selfless.

It means looking beyond yourself to serve another.

Love keeps giving

Even though it may not be received or reciprocated.

It's what mothers and fathers do.  We love.

We cut the edges off of bread.

We leave out the onions.

We crouch down on our knees in the bathroom and hold back the hair of our little one  when a stomach virus comes to visit.

We sit in the car clutching the dashboard when our fifteen year old gets behind the wheel.

We make cookies, read books and wash clothes when we're dead tired.

We say no to requests knowing the eyeroll is sure to come.

We hold on.

We let go.

We refrain from saying "I told you so".

We forgive and forget.

And yet all these things pale in comparison to the love of our father;

How great is the love the father has lavished on us,

 that we should be called children of God!  And that is what we are!

-1 John 3:1

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Yesterday I posted about modesty and how it begins in the inner room (and I don't mean the closet).  Modesty as well as immodesty has its roots in the heart.  The way we dress, speak and even act are outward expressions of our deeper self.

I also shared my belief that many times our style of dressing, misconduct and reckless speech reflect a need to feel accepted.  People in general, but especially young girls want to feel "good enough". Today I want to focus on dress, the area in which young girls often need direction and where I as an adult need reminding.

And as I mentioned yesterday, I am no expert.  And sadly I am not always the perfect example.  A work in progress, I pray that I might become a woman who brings all glory and attention to God.  My hope is that my being (heart and clothes) would point my daughters and other young girls to a modest and vibrant life with the Savior.

Here are a couple of links I found.  I've only skimmed through them so far.  So check them out.

–Rachel Lee Carter is the author of Fashioned by Faith~An International Model Uncovers the Truth about Modesty and Style (Thomas Nelson, 2011).

http://www.modelingchrist.com/

- A PDF checklist detailing how to ensure you're properly dressed before you leave the house

http://girltalk.blogs.com/girltalk/files/modesty_heart_check3.pdf

True Woman's Blog: What and What Not to Wear

http://www.truewoman.com/?id=1702

Modesty in a Hypersexual World

http://solofemininity.blogs.com/posts/2006/01/modesty_in_a_hy.html

I guess this is weird, but I'm giving you a link to my links.  If you haven't gotten a chance to check them out, I have a few to look at under Raising Girls.

http://kristiburden.com/?p=108

Please share your thoughts, other links and your story.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Modesty.

I don't bring up this topic because I'm an expert on it.  I don't bring it up because I'm the perfect example.  I bring it up because I have a teenage son and a preteen daughter.  I bring it up because I have a soon to be seven-year old. I want to be sure I'm bringing her up as "wholesomely" as possible. I write about this....... because I want my children to be modest.

What exactly is modesty?

The second definition given by Merriam Webster is "propriety in dress, speech or conduct".  This is the definition I am familiar with.  This is the definition that has me asking the question "what not to wear", but the first given definition begs for a closer look.

mod.es.ty -

1 : freedom from conceit or vanity

In order for our young people to acquire a modest mindset, we have to go deeper than the style swimsuit we allow them to wear.  We have to consider more than whether or not to let them wear makeup (though these decisions are important too).  We have to go to the heart.

Being a preteen and even teen is difficult.  These years are often defined by a time when  "children" are struggling with not feeling "good enough". This is common if not the rule. How kids view themselves and how they feel they are viewed by others becomes all-consuming. -Not that this can't be an issue with adults (who think that bad hair days are bad days).  Can I get an amen?

As a parent, I know that I would do most anything to bandage their fragile hearts.  I'm afraid though, that even meaning well, in seeking to bolster my kids self-confidence I have jumped on the "How to make your kid feel like they're the prettiest/most handsome/funniest/most athletic/intelligent ... bandwagon.

I have bandaged  this heart wound of not feeling good enough with lip gloss and a new outfit. I have Scooby Doo band-aided this pain with one too many compliments, and dismissiveness to inappropriate dress or even attitude from my kids.

Could it be that my well-meaning compliments and allowances have encouraged my kids to be.....conceited or vain? Have I unintentionally taught them to think and focus on themselves?

If modesty is the freedom from conceit or vanity, then how are they to be free when I make it my goal to ensure their security by helping them "dress" their way to a better image.

Immodesty, I believe, starts on the inside. Immodesty is being held captive to thoughts of oneself. It becomes visible as inappropriate speech and dress becomes apparent.

Vanity is simply a condition which derives from a heart that knows it's "not good enough" and seeks to "feel good enough".

What if we help our children forget about turning heads. What if we help them to look up instead of constantly looking in the mirror.

Psalm 119:37

Your thoughts?

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Yesterday you may have read "Food for Thought-A Grace Story". I introduced the God's Girlies mascot, Grace the plastic flamingo. I posted about the "pinkness" of flamingos.  Surely you know you're looking at a flamingo when you see a bright pink bird with the cane-shaped neck. Another telltale sign of a flamingo is a bird that stands on one leg though it has two long lanky legs.

Flamingos have an amazing balancing act.

As curious creatures, we want to know why.  Why does a flamingo usually stand only on one leg.  There are several theories.

1. The flamingo stands in shallow water much of the time.  It is suspected that just as we get wrinkly from being in the bath too long, the flamingo lifts alternating legs so that its webbed foot doesn't get wrinkly or water-logged.

2. Some scientists think that flamingos only think with one side of their brain at a time.  They also believe that as a flamingo rests, that one side of the brain is resting. And as one side of the brain is resting, the leg that is controlled by that side of the brain is resting too.

3. It is believed by others that raising one leg conserves body heat.  It takes energy to pump blood which in turn uses up body heat.  Tucking the leg is said to be similar to when we're cold and scrunch up in a ball. It conserves body heat. This is actually the most popular theory.

4. One other theory I read about is interesting.  It says that the raising of one leg is a camouflaging technique.  Supposedly the flamingo is trying to look like a tree?. And a tree has one trunk.  Two legs somehow doesn't look like a singular trunk of a tree. I'm not thinking a hot pink bird looks like a tree either.  If you're shaking your head at me, don't, I didn't come up with the theory.

I don't know why flamingos stand only on one leg.  And though curious, I'm not concerned.  My concern lies with how we as humans stand.

Here is where we are unlike flamingos.  We can't stand on our own two feet, much less stand firm singularly. Our balance must come from another source.

 Life is precarious.

 We live wobbly lives swaying this way and that. We need to be braced.  Sometimes we need to be held.  But understand, no thing or person brings about balance and right living in our lives like Christ.

To stand, really stand, when we're constantly up to our ankles in muddy water, it must be Christ that we are relying on.

Be on guard.  Stand firm in the faith.  Be courageous.  Be strong. 

 1 Corinthians 16:13

To Stand.

It doesn't simply say stand firm.

It says-  In the faith.

Not on your own.

Not living according to the prompting of your heart.

Not by the help of  your friends.

Not by some self-help magazine.

Stand firm in the faith even when it feels you're falling.

Trust.

 You're being held up.

And this post my friends...............is not for the birds.

I'd love to hear from you in comments or email- www.kristiburden@gmail.com

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Possibly you've seen pictures floating around of some precious girls with a pink plastic flamingo? That's Grace. Grace the flamingo has become a mascot of sorts for our community of girls referred to as God's Girlies. And there's something I'd like you to know about her.

She's pink.  Like many beautiful flamingos, she's really PINK.

Girls dig the color pink, but more importantly a bright pink flamingo has something to tell. It's a well-known fact that flamingos get their pretty pink hue from their diet.  Yes.  Flamingos eat tiny shrimp-like creatures (also pink) which are rich in carotene.

You are what you eat.

The fancy birds are as pink as the substance they consume.  You will find flamingos with pale pink or white feathers too. Malnourished flamingos are dull in color.  And these birds when held captive don't have that pretty pink coloring; that is unless those caring for them supplement their diet with food rich in carotene.

What are you consuming? 

Are you being filled with the word of God; being filled with his spirit?  Or are you being held captive by the world, thus unfulfilled.

Are you malnourished?  Do you try to get by with a skimpy diet of prayer and bible study?

It's also important to know that when flamingos are looking for their partner they choose the brightly colored flamingos as the company more desired.  That's no surprise to me.

Do you have that glow that attracts people to you?  Can those around you see the brightness of Jesus in you?

Grace.

Sure she's just a plastic bird; a mere model of an extravagant pink bird. But she reminds me of the real beauty.

And that's food for thought.

 

Idea for parents:

Pinkalicious is a cute story where a young girl eats one too many cupcakes.  The cupcakes are pink and unhealthy.  As she consumes the cupcakes (even sneaking one after her mom has said "no more") she begins to take on a pink hue and an attitude.  She has to change her diet to green vegetables to return to a healthy, lovable happy young lady.

I'm thinking this book could bring about some great discussion and maybe even some kitchen fun.

Pinkalicious is written by Victoria and Elizabeth Kann.

 

Click on the link to check out some pictures of Grace and our girls.  All the photos are taken locally.  Try to guess where they're taken.  http://kristiburden.com/?p=1281