Monthly Archives: February 2013

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Dear Hallie,

Today you turn twelve.  As I've been thinking the past few days about how thankful I am for you,  old stories have flooded my mind.  And just like God does, he reminded me how stories-things written from the past are meant to teach us (not to mention, many of your stories have great entertainment value too).

How can I forget the identity you assumed for a year and a half?    You introduced yourself and insisted that people call you "White Kitty".  You often wordless, came into the kitchen in the morning on all fours ready for kitty food. You had an uncle who would try to trick you into saying you were Hallie (or anyone besides White Kitty), but you were an unbendable oak.

The world will try to tell you who you are, and it will undoubtedly tell you wrong.  The world will tell you that you are "the one who looks pretty when you wear makeup and a new outfit" or that you're "the preacher's kid".   Be true to who God made you to be.  Don't let others convince you that you're someone you're not.

A good name is to be more desired than great wealth,  (God's) Favor is better than silver and gold. Proverbs 22:1

You know my favorite story; the one where in first grade, you were asked to draw an animal that started with the letter "a".  You asked your teacher if you could draw a horse.  When she asked if horse started with "a" you shook your head no, but you continued to draw the horse.  Your teacher told me that your hand was the first to go up when asking for volunteers to share their "a" animal.  Nervous, she called on you.  You told her it was an Apaloosa.

You've always been creative, ......and secure.  You have a unique way of thinking and being.  Never trade that in to be another boring member of the crowd.  God put a Hallie Kathryn in the world, on purpose.

Do you remember sailing with another uncle one summer day; the only time you've sailed?  You spotted a small plane with a banner trailing behind bearing an advertisement for Geico.  It showed the Geico Gecko (who wasn't yet the world's most famous Gecko).  The banner had a short advertisement written.  You asked what the sign said.  Your uncle and Hayden convinced you that the sign said  "Beware of sea monsters".    With Nessie about, your sailing experience was ruined.  I watched as my fearless Hallie, who you remember had caught a chicken snake bare-handed a year before, rolled up into a ball, frozen in terror.

Don't be fooled into living in fear.  There are so many things I didn't experience simply because I refused to try, afraid that a host of eyes would see me fail.  Of course I want you to live right, but don't be afraid of messing up.  Sometimes mistakes and failures are the best learning opportunities.  I can already hear you using this one against me in the near future. And if you find yourself anxious, remember I'm here (It may not be best to talk to your uncles).

God continues to write a story through your life.  It's a story rich in love; don't ever forget that.  I'm thankful that we can look back on the pages you've lived through and that we can laugh and even learn.  I'm especially thankful for the pages where our names appear together.  I look to the pages ahead with anticipation. There's much living, learning and laughing yet to be done.

Happy Birthday.

I love you,

Mom

 

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A Word about God's Girlies:

God's Girlies was originally a feeble (and desperate) attempt to have built-in Christian friends for me and my pre-teen Hallie; friends who would join in prayer and look to God's word together to help us along a blessed but sometimes difficult journey as girls, as moms, and as believers. I was also seeking women who could say to me, "I've been there" or "I'm there with you".  Surprisingly what has come about in the past year, in my eyes, is a beautiful and growing community.  This community consists of pre-teen girls and their parents who meet once a month, but also those of you who are connected electronically (on Facebook and this website) at a heart level. Your prayer and words mean more than I can express.

Another addition to God's Girlies is our High School girls who serve as mentors to our pre-teens.  They encourage the girls, and me, at meetings, but they readily shine God's light through hugs and words of affirmation whenever we're blessed to meet up with them.  God is good; his work is beyond my wild imagination. I continue to be amazed at how he uses each of us to encourage and color his world.

If you've been to FBC Nederland, be it Sunday morning or night, or any other time-chances are you've seen Caitlin Washburn.  I'm proud to claim her as one of our God's Girlies mentors.  Here's a little peek into Caitlin's walk.

Give a brief explanation of your testimony and how you came to know Christ as your personal Savior:

I was raised in the Baptist church.  One day when I was four, I wanted to have what my brother had.  So I went to my parents and asked them about it.  I got baptized when I was four as well.

When you heard about the opportunity, what made you want to be a mentor to God's Girlies?

I prayed about it and asked God to show me, or tell me if I was supposed to be a mentor.  I really wanted to, but I was nervous about it.

What is a Bible verse that is meaningful to you?

I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me. Philippians 4:13

What are some things that you wish you would have known when you were a preteen that you know now after growing in Christ and maturing in your faith?

-That no matter what, don't think that no one cares; that you don't matter, because there is always someone who cares.

 

"A Thursday for Your Thoughts" is a perfect opportunity to connect through stories or testimony; consider sharing yours.  You'll be a blessing -guaranteed.

kristiburden@gmail.com

 

 

 

 

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Peep, peep, peep- A God's Girlies Devotion

peeps- a sugary marshmallow treat found in stores around the holidays

peeps- friends

peep /verb/- to look through a small opening (dictionary.com)

You've probably looked through a peep hole.  Your door at home may have one.  When you look through it, your vision is limited.  You might be able to see the head of someone standing outside your door

if they're tall enough

and if they're standing right in front of the peep hole

But even if there's a face in plain sight of the peep hole, there are still many things you won't be able to see.  Name a few things.

We've established that a peep is seeing a small part of the picture through a tiny space, but you're also a peep.  A peep can also refer to a still-growing chick.  You, friends are peeps, and you have peep problems.

Think about whether you have encountered these situations:

You ask to spend the night with a new friend and your mom says no, but you really wanted to....

You don't get the part you want in a play or a dance recital or you don't make "the team".

A good friend starts to hang out with different girls and seems to think you no longer exist/ or a good friend talks about you behind your back. Maybe you feel like you have no friends.

You lose someone you love.

When something like one of these things happens you probably feel like your world has crumbled; like things just couldn't get any worse.  When I'm hurt I often forget there was a yesterday or that there will be a tomorrow.  We feel that way because we only see a small part of the picture........ (we can only peep).

Here are a couple of things to keep in mind:

1. Keep in mind that what you're seeing is a small piece of a picture/ or a snapshot. There's more than what you see. This is a picture of me and Jason's sister during my wedding.  Let your thoughts run wild for a moment.  From this snapshot, what does it appear is going on?  I was shocked when I first saw this picture.  It looks like a throw-down is about to happen.  A split second made it seem that things were going very wrong, but the second before and the second after this picture was taken would tell you that NOTHING was wrong. Sometimes things aren't as they seem.

2.Be patient. When things are going wrong, try and remember that things won't always be this way. The bible says, This too shall pass.  The mistake you make, or something awful that happens may be all you see through life's peep hole.  Give it time and you'll see something more.

3. Trust your parents

 and the one who sees everything.

For most everything tough you're going to go through, your mom has gone through something like it.  Listen to her.  She understands even if she doesn't speak your language or dress hip like you do.  The same goes for older Christian girls, aunts, grandmas and sweet church ladies. They've seen things you haven't seen yet. Talk to them.   And trust them!

Most important, God sees the big picture.  He sees yesterday and tomorrow.  Whereas we see through a peep hole, he sees the whole world and he sees into your heart.  He sees your pain......

And he'll see you through it!

 ..... never give up......... 17 For our present troubles are small and won’t last very long. Yet they produce for us a glory that vastly outweighs them and will last forever! 18 So we don’t look at the troubles we can see now; rather, we fix our gaze on things that cannot be seen. For the things we see now will soon be gone, but the things we cannot see will last forever. 2 Corinthians 4:17-18

 

 

Questions for girls and moms.  Look at the above situations. 

 How could time help you to see the problem differently?  

How could someone older help you through a difficult situation?

How will God help you through your tough times?

Read the verses one more time.

What two things do the verses tell us about our troubles?

Which lasts longer, the troubles we see now or what is unseen?

What is it that we haven't yet seen?

 

 

 

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A friend walked into the house just yesterday.
"Smells like somebody's been baking", she said.  

"It's a lying candle," I told her.

The smell in my kitchen was nothing more than a Blueberry Blitz Tyler candle. I'm no baker.  I burn pop tarts.  The smell also covers up the large bag of garbage in the hall which holds pizza rolls, the closest I got to cooking this week. 

Recently I attended a party with peanut brittle and chocolate peanut patties. They were displayed on a festive plate wrapped with Saran wrap.  I ended up telling several people that my sweets came from Market Basket and I'd simply trashed the plastic containers. Presentation is important. Am I right? 

I don't mean to give anyone a false impression.  If I'm being honest, which I have a habit of being...... to a fault,  I'd say that the facades I present are to convince myself  (more than anyone else) that I'm everything I should be. The festive plate made me feel closer to the mark. Isn't "the mark really just that invisible success line we draw for ourselves as women? 

There's a Super Woman cape calling to me from that finish line I race toward each day, but that cape is one I'll never wear.  And I whisper to myself that I want to wear one; to show myself and the world that I take fine care of my kids and my husband. My cape will tell me what a good friend I am, and church member too.

But wearing a Super Woman cape would be a lie.

Despite my effort, I'm weak

and vulnerable and sometimes afraid;

nothing like a Super Woman, I'm insufficient on my own.

Thinking I have it all together is anything but truthful.  I'm a mess.

It's my realization of my inadequacy and my trust in one who is more than sufficient that wins me a cape; a great covering.

I possess a Super Cape.  It was given to me.  When I'm burning my lying candle at both ends, falling short, my Savior is there beside me and he covers me with that cape.  And I'm reminded that I'm enough as I remember the word spelled out in bold letters across my cape's back.........G R A C E.

“My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.

2 Corinthians 12:9

 

 

 

 

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Guest Writer-Jennifer Horner

 Watch what you leave behind

Have you ever had one of those days where you work so hard to make your house look nice and tidy only to find it destroyed a mere minute after completion?   Well this just happens to be one of my biggest pet peeves. Oh yeah, mean momma comes out when my kids track in mud, grass burrs and throw clothes on the floor.  I love a sense of accomplishment and I have to be honest, house work does not do it for me!

So imagine my surprise when I was AMUSED the other day when I found these ashy footprints all over my hard wood floors.  Normally I would have been steaming, one for the mess my husband made by cleaning out the fireplace and two for the mischievous daughter who HAD to walk through it.

When I happened upon these little prints, it warmed my heart and I felt compelled to take pictures.  I wanted to remember these little feet for some reason.  I could see everywhere she had gone after stepping in the ashes, around the kitchen table, back into the ashes, then to her room.

This reminded me about the footprints we leave behind in life.  Everywhere we go, everything we do, we leave a part of ourselves behind for others to remember.

These prints can be as simple as remembering a face you have seen at Wal-Mart, or as significant as seeing a stranger give his life to save a child in the street.  They can be a positive reminder about how sweet life can be or a bitter memory that causes, hate, pain, and anger.

Some prints will blow away with the wind and be forgotten, while others will turn to stone, forever etched in our memory. 

One of my favorite poems is “Footprints in the Sand”.  It always gives me chills when the man asks Jesus why during the hard times of his life he only saw one set of footprints and Jesus’ reply was, “That is when I carried you!”

We cannot control how others will receive what we leave behind, like the man in the poem didn’t receive Jesus’ action for what it was, an act of love, but we can control whether our actions are positive or negative.

You see, we get to decide what our actions are going to be in life-

How we react to a grumpy bank clerk,

the quality time we spend with our kids,

 what we say we we’ve been hurt.

We have a choice to join in on the world’s sins

 or stand apart and stand for Christ.

 All our choices, all our actions will leave something behind.

What are you going to leave behind?

 

Jennifer Horner is my baby sister.  This is her second time to guest blog on God's Girlies.  (This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.)   If you feel lead to share a story or your thoughts for a future Thursday send me an email.  If you don't feel lead, let me know and I'll try and talk you into writing something anyway.  There's something about  being open and vulnerable that forges friendships.

kristiburden@gmail.com

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What beats four-hundred of my best thought-out words?

This verse..........

well, any verse.

Whatever circumstances meet you on your way today, may you find yourself rejoicing.  And may your troubles be overcome as you have your talks with Jesus.

Come back tomorrow for "A Thursday for Your Thoughts".  Jennifer writes us a good reminder to "Watch what you leave behind".

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I know you're tired

even though you went to bed last night at 8:30

and it's only a Monday.

Thing is, the tired you're feeling isn't fixed with ten hours of sleep or a fresh cup of coffee -or whatever it is that "gets you going"

You're disheartened deep down

-because for all your effort, there still remains a mountain of laundry

and a world of problems you can't solve

You're discouraged.

The word discourage is made of two parts- dis and courage.  Sorry, here comes a definition.  It's my teacher coming out.

courage /ker-ij/ mental or moral strength to persevere, and withstand danger, fear or difficulty (Thanks Merriam)

dis- (as you know) is a prefix meaning "apart"

Through calamities our moral strength is ripped apart.

You haven't experienced a calamity lately?  Even the wear and tear caused by daily demands can cause you to become unraveled.

Dirty dishes.

Bills.

Bickering around you.

Practices and appointments.

Finding the toilet unflushed for the thousandth time....

Isaiah reminds us that even the young "grow tired and weary". We get tired and we need rest, yes.   But we need something more.  When rest leaves you with a tiredness of heart, and Monday finds you anything but refreshed - hold tight to these familiar words

...those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength.  They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint. Isaiah 40:31

The laundry pile will never permanently disappear. That someone in your house may never learn to flush. Some real calamity may even present itself in your life. We can expect these things.  But while we know life is full of these troubles, let us look expectantly to the one who helps us through.

What has you unraveled?

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We sold our house in Trinity yesterday.

And that is cause for some happy back-patting.

It's also cause for some remembering.

My mind rewinds to spring, 2011.  Though we were happy and settled in our home nestled in the Piney Woods, it was looking like a move was in the making.

We decided that it was time to take care of some small, long over-due renovations in order to sell.  My mind went straight to the kitchen. Some spiffing up was in order.  Top of the list? -Making up for the "stove situation".

 We had a top of the line Jen-Air stove top (Well, it was top of the line in the 70's).  On a whim, Jason had thrown away the burner pans not knowing that finding new ones that fit would be impossible.  I'm pretty sure our stove was discontinued.  Ill-fitting burner pans were installed causing cookware to be precariously perched atop, further compromising my already iffy cooking.

I also wanted to brighten up the kitchen; I knew the feeling of being swallowed up by its red hot-tamale painted walls and dark cabinets.

I'd also watched enough "Flip that House" episodes to know that we needed some serious improvement in the area of "curb appeal".

Jason and our contractor had different plans in mind.  In no time, the trim on our house received a fresh coat of the same-as-before boring paint and the porch and sun-room floor was stained in a"man-color".  Our workshop was given a facelift much to my chagrin (the kitchen?!)

The one improvement we agreed upon was the removal of an unsightly bidet in the master bath.  Glad we could agree on something.

I remember telling Jason, "A woman will never want to buy this house.  We better hope for a family with a man in charge".

It was twenty months ago when I mouthed those slightly bitter words;  I've thought them a few times since then.

We received a phone call less than two weeks ago with an offer on our house.  Even better, we made a mad dash to Huntsville yesterday to close the deal.  As we walked into the title company to meet and shake the hand of our rescuers, there wasn't a man with a weak-minded woman alongside as I suspected.

Nope.  There sat a single man.

I knew it.

Already happy that we were selling, I basked in the glory of being right.  I had known that it would be a man wanting the house.

We were all smiles as we got in the car.  As we pulled away Jason claimed the glory his own.  "We might not have sold the house if we hadn't fixed it up like we did".

Our glory was short-celebrated, but happiness ensued.  We sold our house; a financial burden has been removed.  And though momentarily taking credit for such a happy occasion, we know from whom this blessing flows.

We're thankful.

And we're giving credit where credit is due.

Not to us, O LORD, not to us but to your name be the glory, because of your love and faithfulness.  Psalm 115:1

We made a two-minute stop at the house yesterday to say our last goodbyes. We experienced much of God's love and faithfulness in that house and with our Trinity family.  So many good memories.  In my next post, I just might have to post some of our favorites.

 

 

 

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I see my children.

I saw our daughter Rylie standing rather suspiciously in the kitchen just the other day. The hand behind her back held an oatmeal cream pie with a bite missing.

Every morning I give my children a look-over. I check the boy, Hayden, for hair bumps that often arise when he lies on wet hair after his morning shower.

I see the eye makeup that our preteen Hallie is hoping I won't notice.
I am the Mom who sees.


Not only do I see my children in a gotcha sort of way,

I also see when one of them exits school with shoulders slumped slightly because it hasn't been the best day.
I watch, in adoration as Hayden and Hallie laugh in unison at a YouTube video-a beautiful sight.
I look.

I watch and I see.


Or so I'd like to think.  My kids have thrown me for a loop more than once in the past few days.
One rather long day this week I kissed my seven-year old, already in bed, goodnight, saving her bath for the morning. I noticed the next morning as she crawled out of bed that she slept in her school clothes (I probably shouldn't be telling that).
I found out another one of my children had a rough spell with a close friend months ago. How could I have missed that?


I took Rylie to the ophthalmologist this week to find out she needs glasses and an eyepatch-I was blind to her bad vision, Oh the irony. There were signs, for crying out loud.

Sometimes I blink and I miss things.

Other times there are blurry things; things foreign, unfamiliar.  

And if I'm really honest, I'd say there are times I see things which make me want to cover my eyes; things I wish I didn't have to see.

But I can rest assured in El Roi; the God who sees.

He's the God who saw Hagar in the desert when she was otherwise abandoned.

He is the one mentioned in Psalm:

3 You discern my going out and my lying down;

you are familiar with all my ways. Psalm 139:3

He sees.

Everything.

 Tears cried,

and that bad grade

 you didn't know about

that made its way to the garbage,

how your son held the door open

for the woman who could only move slowly,

 and your daughter's integrity

 in that difficult trial last week.

He knows what's under their bed.

There are no surprises.

No blinking or looking off.

He doesn't miss a thing.

He sees.

That spells b-l-e-s-s-e-d   r-e-l-i-e-f to these eyes.

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(It's 3:27 a.m. and my fingers are sleepy, doing their best to keep up with the thoughts that are flooding my mind.  This kind of writing (the kind that wakes me up) is usually the writing that I know is for me.)

I don't deal well with rudeness.  Some people wouldn't know this about me because for years I only internalized my feelings.  I'm noticing though, with age, that my filter that decides what I say and what I keep internalized is growing thinner and maybe more holey.  (I hope I don't confuse you into thinking I mean holy, I mean full of holes).

It's been a particularly busy week in which I've dealt with a lot of people; a few that were snippy and unforgiving.  With my increasing tendency to be intolerant of this behavior I'm having to adjust my rude reactor.

Reaction to Rudeness Reminders

1. A good disposition that can be easily deposed isn't really a good disposition.

I feel I'm generally pretty pleasant.  If I am in need of assistance, say in a store or in the school office, I will wait my turn.  I will make my request in an undemanding manner making it known that I appreciate that person's time and assistance.  But all it takes is a sideways glance from that person, conveying "You're wasting my time" or "STUPID question!" and my sweet disposition has crumbled.  If a look, or a lack of response to my kindness ruins my mood, then my mood needs to grow some muscles.

  2.Reciprocal rudeness is still rude.

 Reciprocal rudeness-when someone is rude and you're rude back.  Wednesday I was about to pull into Dairy Queen.  A lady in front of me on the opposite side of the road had her left blinker on to turn in to DQ.  She assumed I was going to turn in before she got her chance; that I was getting ready to "cut" her in line.  I don't read lips that well, but she was definitely cursing me waving her arms about wildly.  So I felt the need to return the theatrics by making my eyes big and mouthing dramatically, "I SEE YOU"! ( In other words, settle down I'm waiting for you).  My words were unnecessary and unkind. Rudeness is rude if you start it or not.

3. A smile has more value when it's given to the seemingly undeserving.

...... I will forget my complaint, change my expression and smile. Job 9:27

It's easy to smile when things are going your way; when you're around pleasant people.  But there are some people who are just emotionally draining.  They're negative.  They can be unresponsive or over- reactive.  When your smile has been challenged with someone rude, smile anyway.  Make it not about you and how someone has made you feel.

4.People who are unmerciful are typically the ones who need to be shown mercy.

 I explained to one of my kids yesterday that I was sorry for being grumpy, but that I'd had a long hard week. The point? You don't know what the person with a snarky  attitude may have been through five minutes before you encountered them. That person that always seems snippy or combative for no apparent reason may be may be suffering in a way you couldn't imagine.

In the words of Jesus:

....bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you

If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them.

Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.

Luke : 6: 28, 32, 36

5.  Have your "unhappy dialogue" with God.

There's always an unhappy dialogue when I've dealt with someone rude.  In my weakest moments I snip back at that person or act more cool, dropping the warm smile.  My encounters with rudeness are also usually shared with those I am close to.  This is where, still fuming, I share what "I should have said back to that person".  There is no one who is more worth sharing your "unhappy dialogue" with, than Jesus.  He is the diffuser of anger.  Time with him allows me to refuel on love; the kind of love that's unaffected by the thing we call "feelings".

How do you deal with rudeness?

Or is there another behavior that drives you bonkers?