The Lovely List and other Niceties

Families are one of God's most precious creations. While we ought to be honoring each God-designed member with love and respect, it's often our family members that see our worst side.  

Being free to be ourselves can sometimes get ugly.  Comfortable at home we often use our words carelessly.  Being in our castle, we find ourselves inclined to lose our patience with anyone who disturbs our peace or pleasure.  On the other end of the spectrum, our busyness prevents us from spending time together and enjoying one another. 

Hopefully you've gotten a chance to check out:

-the Family Contract

-and just for fun The Daughter of the Year Contract


Think about starting a Lovely List (pictured above) as a family project.  If the name isn't masculine enough, it could be called the Whatever List.  We have started one in our family.  It hangs on our refrigerator.  It's basically a lined piece of paper that has Philippians 4:8 on the bottom.

...whatever is true, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable-if anything is excellent or praiseworthy-think about such things.-Philippians 4:8

If Jason or I or even the kids notice something right, lovely or admirable we write it on the list.  It could be something positive that happened at school.  Seeing a flower or a blue sky and being reminded of beauty in God's creation could be noted.  Take notice of Your son saying thank you to his sister.  Our perspective is changed a bit when we are looking for lovely things instead of things to argue about or tattle on.

OBVIOUSLY, contracts, lists or any other creative ploy to bring about harmony is useless without constant prayer on our families behalf- (I'm reminding myself).


*Please share things you are doing with your family.  I'd love to hear from you!

2 thoughts on “The Lovely List and other Niceties

  1. That is such a lovely idea! I'm going to try that with my 4th grade! I have noticed lately that even the kids already start seeing all the negative things in life. I'm doing something that I call the "warm shower". There are two versions of it. One is, that we are all standing in a circle, one kid is sitting on a spinning-chair in the middle and everybody will say something nice about that child, like "I like your smile" or "I think you are a great singer" or something The kids love it. The other version is, that we are standing together in a circle and everbody has to say something nice or what they like about THEMSELVES! And THAT is the hard part. Most of the kids are aware of what they DON'T like but it seems hard for them to find something they truely like about themselves. And that is so sad. All of my kids are gifts from God and they are just the way He wanted them to be. But somehow it is easier for them to see the negative things about them instead of the positive ones. Thank you for that neat little idea. I will report how it worked out in class. 

    1. Kristiburden

      I love the "warm shower" idea.  And I agree that it's sometimes most difficult to be accepting of ourselves.  It's awesome that you're teaching them to be accepting of themselves and affirming toward others.  Lucky kids!!!  Fourth grade is a hard age.  I LOVE hearing ideas and would love a report of how this works out. 
      Any plans for a trip to the U.S.?


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